Wednesday, 4 August 2010

Our brave boys.

One of Leamington's busiest public spaces was closed off by police after violence erupted among about 100 so called 'sports fans' yesterday morning. Police cordoned off the Riverside Walk in Victoria Park as violence broke out among rival supporters, who were in Leamington for what is considered by many to be the annual 'world cup' of women's bowling.

Eyewitnesses said officers in riot gear and with police dogs forced the fans into the Royal Leamington Spa Bowling Club Tea Rooms where they were contained in a classic 'pressure kettle' operation similar to that used by the Metropolitan Police last year's G20 protests in the city of London.

Several hours later the police were seen to escort some supporters to the railway station where further confrontation occurred outside the Pumpkin Cafe on platform one, a so called 'coffee shop', known by local residents as a place where intoxicating stimulants and 'specialist magazines' have been freely available over the counter at all hours of the day and night.

One person has not been arrested in connection with the incident.

Eyewitness Sandra Binstead, who works in a building some distance from the incident, said she was not allowed to leave the premises for about two hours. She said the first she knew of the trouble was at about 1130 BST when she heard the sound of breaking glass and several police helicopters overhead. Asked if she was frightened, she said: "I was more concerned in case anyone hadn't been unnecessarily injured by the police."

Detective Superintendent Ceestreamer from Warwickshire Police, says hooliganism is not just a problem for women's bowls.

"Reports from all over the country show the extent of the opportunistic and violent problem that we still face ... the activities of this kind of person can be seen on beaches, in bed and breakfast accommodation and outside English country pubs throughout the summer months".

"But women's bowls, with its inherent tribalism, passions and loyalties has always been a beacon for such boorish behaviour, and this police force is committed to eradicating it whenever and wheresoever it may surface" he said.

Mobile phone footage of the disturbance has recently appeared on youtube, and Chief Inspector Huge Pension-Pott of Warwickshire Police has appealed for anyone who recognises the ringleaders to call Crimestoppers on 0800 555 111, as otherwise the chances of securing any conviction are laughably small.


"... the public can be reassured by the fact that keeping the police occupied elsewhere will make Leamington a safer place on match days," he added.

Monday, 2 August 2010

Local MP makes a stand.

The US mid-term elections are only weeks away, yet senior Washington officials have conceeded that Barack Obama's credibility as a leader was under the fiercest pressure last night after he was rounded upon by local MP Jeremy Whitte.


The Conservative member for West Kenilworth and Southam has demanded that the US President refrain from criticisms of BP based upon national identity; 'that's just the sort of thing one would expect from an American' he said, adding that 'it's well known that only fifteen per cent of adults in the United States even own a passport, and so it's hardly surprising that this Johnny is unaware of the effect that the Gulf of Mexico oil spill has had upon Britain's 1000 mile shoreline'.

During a keynote speech at the Whitnash and Sydenham Home Guard and Pensioner's Club, Mr Whitte, a long standing non-executive director of British Petroleum, said 'as an erstwhile school chum of the former Chairman, Lord Browne of Maddingley, let me tell you BP is a damn fine company, and its safety record is something of which the whole nation can be proud'.
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Furthermore, 'should there be a careless explosion on an American owned, Korean built, Mexican maintained oil rig, and President Obarmy feels he should be kicking some ass, then this ass should be nearer to home' he said.

In a separate development, local residents appeared puzzled by Mr Whitte's unequivocal support for what he termed 'the beleagured Warwickshire deep water fishing fleet'.

Mr Whitte said that the new government was 'determined to do all it can to keep Warwick's fishing fleet at sea, both for the good of the nation's culture and its economy'.

He added that 'it was in keeping with the proud historical tradition of free enterprise that our seas be systematically stripped of every living organism, and that if history shows us one thing, it's that the Conservative party will never stand in the way of progress'.
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President Obama is 49.

Cricket News

That recently concluded Pakistan fourth innings in full ...

Farthat Kash 15
Salman Bung 9
Ali-ttle Dosh 0
Amin Payment 1
Aamer-ican Express 4
U Akrim ? 4
Whaddyamean Wazi 0
Shoab Themoney 9
Kamran Actnormal 0
Danesh Kaneefyapayme 16*
Asif I Care 0

Umpires: L Adbrookes and Paddy Power.

This page brought to you by our man at Trent Bridge, William Hill.

NB: This post pre-dated the News of the World front pager by three weeks ... Once again, Not the Leamington Courier, FIRST for news !